REMEMBERAMBLE!! April 23, 2026

Kang and Emporer Wade 1st, Princes Conway & Merle, ruler of all of the Canoochee-Garfield Metropolitan area, and Emporer of all of Pinetucky

I know some of you have murmerred a bit about my crown and why it is really a half-crown, have you seen the price of gold lately? Have you seen the cost of shicken these days? We are not a wealthy kangdom, at all. I know as your Kang, I have always run on the platform of not taxing squirrel eggs, nor pine cones from oak trees, but that may change soon. I am even considering placing a "CUSS BOX," at the Garfield City Limit sign (we have only the one, we can't afford a sign on the other end of town, because, have you seen the prices of road signs lately?), and levy a cuss tax on cuss words uttered by the peasants or travelers on their way to Mecca, Statesboro, Thrift, or Butts. I considered placing higher fines/taxes on certain "ugly" words, but in order to do that I would have to say all of the words out loud for the sign painter guy because he can't read or write, and then I would not be in compliance with the no-cuss zone, and as your kang, I never place myself above the law. Well, maybe just a lil bit now and then. Anyway, I digress, so there will be a flat tax on all cusswords, to be set as one-half of one percent of the millage rate per annum and all such things as that, of processed copper of coinage purity, without relation to any dimes, nickels, quarters or pocket lint found therein. If you find this confusing, I have it all written down somewhere. Keeping a small kangdom running and the princes fed, is not as easy as it looks, from beyond the moat, where y'all are. I mean, you know the Queen rundof years ago, leaving us boyz three, as pore lil ole orphans. She took the Tupperware, the good jelly glasses and all of the Vacation Bible School art works with her! She even took the pot we used to pee in...well, some of this oughta I reckon be kept in the family, so I will not tell you what she did to the window we used to throw it out of! Raising two Princes all alone with no queen is tough, that is why bee hives almost always try to have at least one. I went online a time or two on a dating site, and learned two things, never say on there that you are looking for a "queen!" No, don't do that, at all! Second, do not mistype Christian Mingle as "Christian Dingle." Nuff said. We love y'all, God bless you and keep you, and, uhm, "have a nice day!"